Another key photograph dealing with mortality, Disappear, introduces my significant relationship with Larry and is anything but comforting. My intention was to create a soothing domestic picture of intimate comfort, but when I view this image, it punches me in the gut and takes my breath away. My powerful reaction parallels the deep emotional connection I have with this man I’ve known and loved for 30 years.
I live in constant fear and anticipatory grief of this impending loss; I’m not quite sure how life exists without him. I don’t know if I will ever feel differently when I look at Disappear, nor do I want to.